Carrie

Carrie.jpg

WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE A FIRST TIME MOTHER?

 Everything happens only for a little while, the baby snuggles, the sleeping in your arms, the crafts that you really don’t have time for because of the endless lists of things to do, the sports or dance or cheer, once those years pass by you wish with every ounce of you that you could have them back. So, when you are holding your sleeping baby, toddler, teenager snuggling next to you and your mind wanders to the chores, the lunches to pack and all of the stuff that never seems to end, FORGET IT all of it. Snuggle your child and let them sleep and enjoy the peacefulness that comes over you in that moment. Life is hectic. The dishes will be there tomorrow. But your child will grow faster than you can imagine and those little moments will be the ones that you remember forever, and so will they.

WHAT IS YOUR FONDEST MEMORY OF YOUR OWN MOTHER?

 I’ve thought of this line and written it down and erased it a thousand times. There are so many memories that are important to me. My fondest memories are eating breakfast in the kitchen and my Mom would be doing the dishes, my Dad would come up behind her and wrap his arms around her, she would get so annoyed because she was busy but you could see that she loved it. I love that moment and can picture it today like it’s frozen in time.

HOW DO YOU DEFINE BALANCE AND HOW DO YOU ACHIEVE IT?

Balance is one of the most difficult things for Mom’s. And I’m actually not sure that you can actually achieve it. You can try and fail and try and maybe sometimes achieve it just to reach for it again. I was a single Mom living at home, working evenings and attending school during the day when my daughter was small. Thankfully I had my family to help. It was a balancing act for sure and sometimes you just have to rely on a helping hand. Remember you can’t do it all on your own. And that’s OKAY.

HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOUR PARENTING STYLE?

 Strong Love. I love my daughter with every ounce of me but I believe in limits, rules and respect.

WHAT STAGE DID YOU FIND THE MOST EXCITING/ FRIGHTENING?

 Every stage was exciting! But my most exciting and frightening experience of all time was Graduation. I was extremely proud of my daughter and excited to see her head out into the world and learn and experience everything young women should. But at the same time scared to death of what that experience meant. It meant she was leaving me. It meant she was independent and when bad things happened I wouldn’t be there or even the first to know. I cried my eyes out the morning of her graduation, stayed in bed the entire morning…….but smiled the biggest when she received her diploma. My heart felt like it would explode I was so proud!

WHAT IS THE BIGGEST MOTHERHOOD CHALLENGE YOU FACE / OR MOTHERS FACE IN GENERAL?

 Everyone is different. I chose to go to University and have a career. But I would have loved to stay home and not miss a moment of the growing up. We constantly compare ourselves to others, motherhood is no different. We just need to learn that it’s our story. And we should live it the way we choose, no regrets!

HOW HAVE YOU NAVIGATED THE WORLD OF SINGLE PARENTING?

 Being a single mother was extremely difficult. But something I would never change. My daughter is my biggest fan and I am hers. Life happened whether I was ready for it or not. We just figured it out. I had lots of help from my parents and sisters. My daughter and I had huge blow out fights. But we always made up. I drove A LOT, to work to home to cheer. When she got older to work to home to her work to home back to pick her up. We struggled lots but we had so many good times, and the good always outweighed the bad. In the end and I am more proud of her and myself that we made it through and we are still both alive and good people. In my opinion, she was the best thing I’ve ever done in my life and being a single parent is one thing I would not change even if I had a choice. I think my daughter definitely didn’t get to have what other kids had, and when she wanted something bad enough she worked for it, which killed me but it made her a better person for it, I think. She is now a third year nursing student on the Dean’s List no less. And I am thankful for everything she’s brought into my life!